The distance between us right now hurts my delicate babygirl heart. Not falling asleep 'with' you creates an empty void in me that is indescribable. All I wish right now is that I could be beside you...
Flying here yesterday was such a lonely experience. As I wandered through the airport, all I could think of was how I should be flying somewhere else-to you. I walked, and thought, and felt so sullen. The signs with all of the flights there made me feel so desperate.
Filled with desperation and sorrow, all I could do was think how full of elation I would be if only I were on the way to you...
I know one day I will be, hopefully sooner than later, but still, in this moment, it does nothing to calm this aching babygirl heart.
I'm feeling very lonely and ignored. And I know you are in a place where you need to show your appreciation and not ignore those who brought you there. However, it doesn't stop how i really feel. Ignored, left aside, not your daddy anymore and certainly not your priority. I just want to go there and take you back home to me. I have an empty void that i feel i've lost my baby girl and my gf. I know you rest assure your feelings and love but i just feel really sad and it doesn't have me in a good place mentally or emotionally. I feel I have to ask permission to call you and that is so not how I roll or want to roll. But I love you enough to swallow my pride and go with the flow. I know your in a hard spot and I don't want it any worse for you. Sometimes I think too much and just want to bow out and away until you are home and my feelings are not as vunerable or hurt. Back home where you belong to have me all to myself. I had such a very bad day today at work. Although I did talk to you for a few minutes from time to time it wasn't the same. I feel you need to constantly have two conversations at the same time and it drives me to insanity. But in the end i am hoping it's all worth it.
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